The Boss has been really busy, making cool stuff:



I'm a big help, because I'm constantly babbling inane bullshit, gibbering and capering around like a self-medicating chimp, and ignoring me for hours at a time has given The Boss amazing powers of concentration. She exhibits a truly admirable work ethic, even when I'm working on my latest project:



...which is admittedly terrible, just horrible noises and juvenile reference points collaged together in a big stupid murky sloppy pile. And while I'm quite the fan of what The Boss is doing — the hard work, the craftsmanship, the careful and muted palette, the melancholy streaks that add a real complexity, the time she spends searching out unusual and high-quality materials, the way she gives her characters subtle but tangible personality with an understated and concise aesthetic — she does not reciprocate and of course really really really hates hates hates my dumb crap and who could blame her.

"You'd like it if the Butthole Surfers did it," I say. "You love the Butthole Surfers."

"I do love the Butthole Surfers, but their noise eventually turns into a song," she says.

"Yeah, I guess... The ones that turn into songs are the ones that suck."

"Anyway, I listened to the Butthole Surfers when I was 15."

It's funny, my friends Todd and Scott were just having a conversation about the ol' "I grew out of that" snob thing longtime friends drop into conversations about music. They had two keen observations:

"When you ask them what they like now, the answer is Wilco. Always Wilco."

"When it's not Radiohead..."

"Those bands are fine, but do they have to replace the stuff you grew up on? I mean, I liked pizza when I was 13. Did they grow out of pizza too?"

So I like noise, and The Boss likes Wilco, and Radiohead, a lot, but we both still like pizza. Which is good. Because you have to base a relationship on something. Also, we both dig this, at least:

happy ending



Tom said...

Why is that bear molesting those children? And wearing a hat? What's with the hat?

Patrick Hughes said...

Relax. It's art.

Lando said...

pedobear must be gentle. the birds are hanging out for the fun too.

lex said...

Lovely! (I mean Happy Ending, not Black Stabbath. Sorry.)

Patrick Hughes said...

Yeah, I know...


DyShaun said...

Is that sweet Fern and dear Henry?


Anonymous said...

I love mary's granddaughter!

Ben said...

I dunno, if I was forced to listen to noise, I'd probably take Black Stabbath any day. Maybe even if I wasn't forced; just prodded.

Antonia said...

I just got back in touch with one of the people who introduced me to the Butthole Surfers. He also used to listen to Can, Loop, and even to sine waves when he was really trashed.

Now he only likes Beyonce and the Ting Tings. Someone ate his brain. I bet it tasted like cold pizza.

gutshot said...

OK! Antlers for everyone. As if getting sweaters onadn off wasn't hard enough...

Anonymous said...

"Did they grow out of pizza too?"

This is some deep science.

I still like teh Iron Maiden albums.

Salty Miss Jill said...

What a mushball you are.
The Boss, she got talent.
Don't fuck it up.

Ozma said...

Radiohead is easy listenin' for cool people. And I mean that. Those who turn to Radiohead in their aging coolness, well they are still cool. Right? Right?

Sometimes you need some easy listenin' and Radiohead is doing mankind a great service for being easy listening for us when we get old. Because we're still cool, you know? And this ruins all the other easy listening.

I still like Black Sabbath. I mean, the opening to Iron Man. I must love that for as long as I live. I like a little screaming now and then when I drive--you know, Rage Against The Machine. They suck but when I turn away from easy listenin' and feel like hearing some screaming I'm too old to remember any good screaming music and far too elderly to discover new screaming to enjoy. But mostly I forget to listen to music and then I amuse myself by buying a tape of Steve Miller at the used book sale and then somehow that ends up being the only tape in the car even though I dug up some kind of twenty year old Dinosaur Jr. tape that doesn't work in places a few months ago. Where did it go?

It's sad, getting old.

Nick O'Siris said...

Black Stabbath is my new favourite music. Sell me a t-shirt. Or maybe you could collaborate with The Boss to create a scary embroidered paedo-Bear Black Stabbath t-shirt? Just saying.

Ignatz Rabinowitz said...

Got this friend who, 25 years ago, was on the football team and only listened to Motley Crue and that kind of crap. Graduated and went in to the navy. Since getting out he's become increasingly hard to talk to. I asked him recently "So what kinda' music you listening to these days, my metal-head friend?"
"Well, I still listen to Crue when I'm working out, but mostly I listen to adult contemporary. I love Kenny G!"

Wonderful World of Weiners said...

I was wondering if you might be willing to mention my raffle/fundraiser. I would NOT ask if it wasn't for a great cause. Plus, there are over 90 donated prizes to win totaling over $3000.00! And who doesn't like to win??

It's really a win-win for everyone. People get to help me meet my fundraising goal AND potentionally win big.

Yesterdat was the 6th anniversary of my Dad's heart transplant. I am more determined than ever to give back in a big way.

This is the comment I have been leaving on certain blogs in hopes that the word will get out about what I'm trying to do.

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE clickover and enter my raffle!! You can truly win TONS OF PRIZES (totaling over $3000.00 - goft crds, Starbucks coffee maker, $600 in camping equipemtn, gorgeous jewelry).

It's for a great cause….


6 years ago my Dad received a new heart.

This is my way of giving back.

Thank you for any help you can give,

Anonymous said...

It is time. Time for a new post, motherfucker!

Anonymous said...

What Anonymous above said. Times ten.

Republibot 3.0 said...

Found this site through the Black Stabbath thing. Soooooooo is it like abandoned, or will you be updating it again sometime soon? Like before I get done typing this? No? Dammit, man, I've only just met you and your enchantingly blistered, sunburned legs, and you're already letting me down...

Anonymous said...


Tina Baby said...

I just started reading your Diary of Indignities when I ran out of David Sedaris books. You're cracking me up, I'm really enjoying it. I can't wait to catch up on your blog stuff.

If you have a minute, check out my blog, you might particularly enjoy my review of Caligula, my 3 day colon cleanse or my nose surgery story. None of the above are for the squeamish, but after reading about your ass crack, I don't think you are.

Also, are you on twitter? You can find me at http://twitter.com/TinaSteele

I'm glad I found you - keep bringing the funny/embarrassing/funny.

Anonymous said...

Are you still there? Please update kind sir I need a laugh. :-)

Anonymous said...

Please update. I just read ALL of the B.N.H. archives. ALL OF THEM.

joseph said...

*poke* *poke*
"is it dead?"

Ben said...

I think it's dead.